Tuesday 4 November 2014

Daggers (over)drawn

Last week I complained about London bar prices.

But there's little point in getting upset about these things.  They exist and it's best not to think about them.  A bit like Piers Morgan.

It was in this spirit that I returned to the capital on Saturday for a day trip with the male in-laws.

And here they are.


From right to left we have my nephew Jack, brother-in-law Jonathan, stepdad-in-law Mike and - last and by all means least - other brother-in-law Dagenham Dave.

The eagle-eyed amongst you may recognise the location, Twickenham, where England can often be found trying and generally failing to play rugby.

Thankfully two proper teams were on show at the weekend when Australia took on the Barbarians.


It is obviously customary on such occasions to have a pint or two, which we did (other than Jack who's not old enough and is the son of a policeman).

And lo and behold, Dagenham Dave stepped forward to buy the first round.

A couple of quick facts about Daggers if you haven't encountered him here before.  Number one, he's actually from Guildford (but Morrissey didn't write a song called Guildford Dave so he's stuck with the nickname we've given him).  And number two, he's officially the tightest man on the planet, making his decision to crack open his little purse all the more surprising.

But, gloriously, an even big shock lay in store - for him.

"Four pints of Beck's, my good man," said our hero, trying to sound thrilled about his selfless deed.

Four pints poured and handed out, it was time for the fun bit.

"£24, please sir," announced the barman.

It was, without question, one of the happiest moments of my life.

What was not fully appreciated by old Dave when he volunteered to be so generous was that, at Twickers, you also have to buy your "souvenir" (plastic) glasses when purchasing the first drink, which they then change if you go for a refill.


I've rarely enjoyed an alcoholic beverage quite so much - whilst Dave almost choked on his.

Yes, even London prices have their merits.