Not The Savoy

I'm not saying the pub Vanessa and I stayed in on Friday night was pants but, to avoid obscenity, I did consider keeping mine on when I was in our "en suite" shower (three feet from the bed, four feet from the  telly)  in case I dropped the soap.

And whilst I applaud the owners' tough line on drugs, I wouldn't want to be on their team at a spelling bee.