Now that the guest list has been settled, I can now exclusively announce the headline (OK, only) act at Jamie's sixth birthday party next month.
Yes folks, it's the wizards' wizard himself.
It's Cosmo the Cosmic Magician.
Hailing from "a family of top children's entertainers in Leeds," Cosmo has been making things disappear - before then making them reappear so he can reuse them - since 1995. (According to his website, he also has an up-to-date police check and public liability insurance, so it's all good).
Vanessa spoke to "Janey the Magical Assistant" earlier today, and the deal has been done. She says she now knows what Glastonbury organiser Michael Eavis must feel like when he hooks a big one.
As for any parents reading this, I can also reveal that the bar at Aireborough Rugby Club - where the party is taking place - will be open during the show. And I for one intend to find out how much Foster's I can make vanish into thin air until it closes.