Friday, 30 April 2010
Thursday, 29 April 2010
Wednesday, 28 April 2010
With just a week of General Election campaigning left to go, you may have thought you had heard enough "exciting," "bold" and "innovative" ideas from politicians to last you a lifetime.
But no, because the Monster Raving Loony Party have just published their manifesto and, I have to say, some of their policies are worthy of serious consideration by whoever does end up running our lives after May 6th.
For example, they have proposed introducing a 99p coin to "save on change." Apparently, this pledge also appeared in their 2005 manifesto but, according to party leader Howlin' Laud Hope, "no-one noticed it then, so we're still shouting about it now." Quite right too.
Other suggestions - individual candidates can pick from an extensive list or choose their own - include:
- All socks to be sold in packs of three as a precaution against losing one
- Self-responsibility to be banned on health and safety grounds
- Making it illegal for superheroes to use their powers for evil
- Change the English symbol of three lions to three badgers
- The House of Commons Speaker to be replaced by the latest audio equipment
- All forms of greyhound racing to be outlawed to stop the country going to the dogs
And my personal favourite, "ban all terrorists from having beards as they look scary." That should spoil Gerry Adams' breakfast.
Howlin' Laud Hope says he has had a "wonderful" reaction to his own campaign in Witney so far, where he is challenging Conservative Leader David Cameron, and hopes to keep his deposit.
However, his party has warned that, if he gets that many votes, he is obviously "not loony enough" and will have to leave.
Tuesday, 27 April 2010
Monday, 26 April 2010
- Despite being a couple of months short of two years old, Jamie can actually kick a ball, and
- He's all left foot.
However, the second clip shows a definite and, I think, amusing aspect of his character i.e. he knows when he's had enough.
But clearly, I am biased.
Sunday, 25 April 2010
Saturday, 24 April 2010
I'm sure no-one noticed, but I didn't update this dross yesterday because, after a morning and early afternoon of feeling increasingly dreadful, I ended up having to concede defeat and retire to my scratcher.
I haven't been in top form all week but, whatever it was/is in my system, decided to come back on Thursday night and reek havoc. However, I'm feeling much better today so it's onwards.
And yesterday was, of course, St George's Day so I hope all ye olde English gentlefolk out there took the opportunity to mark it appropriately.
Whilst I am proudly a quarter English myself - my grandfather hailed from Somerset - Jamie is obviously twice that proportion. It was therefore vital in my book that he played his full part in yesterday's planned St George's Day activities during a rare Friday visit to nursery.
I bought him a new patriotic tee shirt earlier in the week to coincide with the red and white colour theme.
And, over the course of his day, he made a St George's Cross hat, drew pictures of the great man fighting a dragon and finished off with a traditional English afternoon tea of cucumber sandwiches and scones.
Meanwhile in Bradford (prior to falling off my perch), this was the scene outside my office window.
Thursday, 22 April 2010
Wednesday, 21 April 2010
Tuesday, 20 April 2010
Monday, 19 April 2010
Sunday, 18 April 2010
Two particular highlights for me.
Saturday, 17 April 2010
Friday, 16 April 2010
Thursday, 15 April 2010
They've been filming Gail Tilsey-Platt-McIntyre's trial in Bradford City Hall/"Weatherfield Crown Court" for the last 10 days, and yesterday afternoon I managed to capture the moment the Barlows arrived for the verdict in Steve McDonald's cab.
Wednesday, 14 April 2010
Tuesday, 13 April 2010
Monday, 12 April 2010
Isn’t it, like, all bright and shining?
Yes, yes and yes, I think you’ll agree.
But what is it, exactly?
Well, it’s our big garden light.
And what makes it so special?
Answer: it’s that this particular light – or rather, the bulb in it which blew up - hasn’t worked since September 2008.
I did buy a new bulb a few days after the original incident but managed to wreck the screw which you had to remove to get at the old one. And since then, not just me,but also Jamie’s Grandads Mike and Derek have had a multitude of goes between us at trying to hacksaw through the screw. But all to no avail.
Until yesterday, that was, when I tried out a new hacksaw blade and BINGO! The light fell open.
But all’s well that ends well. I bought another new bulb at lunchtime today, eventually got it in after around half an hour tonight - suffering only one burnt hand. And, quite literally, I now have a new light in my life.
I hope you’re as pleased for me as I am for myself.
Bring on the dark nights!!!
Oh, hold on…
Sunday, 11 April 2010
Saturday, 10 April 2010
Friday, 9 April 2010
So, being a little bored and having seen the exact same thing happen a couple of weeks ago, I enquired of one of the men in uniform as to why there were four of them at one entrance and none at the other.
Thursday, 8 April 2010
Wednesday, 7 April 2010
Tuesday, 6 April 2010
And then, for a solid calendar month, we can look forward to wall-to-wall politicians: on our televisions, in our newspapers, in our town centres and - joy of joys - even on our doorsteps.
But, in amongst the thousands of candidates standing for the 650 seats up for grabs, I ask you to look out for just one.
My mate Rodney McCune.
Rodney and I first met in the late 1990s when I was employed by the Ulster Unionists in Westminster and he was doing a bit of work experience with us whilst at law school in London.
Since then, he was become a very successful barrister and, as the Ulster Unionist candidate in North Antrim at the 2005 General Election, took 6,637 votes off that nasty old b*stard Ian Paisley.
This time, Rodney has been selected to stand as the joint Conservative and Unionist candidate in East Antrim.
And the contest will be unique as the constituency is currently represented in Parliament by Ulster's only living Troll, Sammy Wilson, who also serves as the part-time Finance Minister in the Northern Ireland Executive.
Sammy's regards himself as a "funny man" and he's certainly that but, sadly for him, in a clown rather than a joker type way.
He also has what could be loosely termed "arse and elbow recognition problems."
For example, the respected political website They Work for You describes his voting record in the House of Commons as "a mixture of for and against a transparent Parliament." A man of deep principle then.