Tuesday, 28 June 2011

George Orwell was right

Fun and games on the way home tonight. 

I was walking through Guiseley when I came across the first "drive-thru" Boots I have certainly ever encountered (roll on 6 July).

What will they think of next?

The answer was immediately opposite.  Not really, it was a KFC you could "drive to."

As opposed to what, exactly?  Hop to? 

So I got my trusty camera out and took the pics you can see above, before putting my snapper back in my bag and heading off in the direction of my house.

But I didn't get far. 

About a minute later, I felt a hand upon my shoulder (a real one, as opposed to the imaginary one that grabbed Tony Blair but sadly failed to throttle him).  And when I turned around,  I saw it was attached to some bloke wearing what genuinely looked like a pretend security man outfit. 

Seriously, he was either in fancy dress or he was a stripper.  But he didn't seem for real. 

"What were you taking photos of?" he asked, trying to be intimidating but not in any way succeeding. 

"Sorry?" I replied, more than a little bemused.

"I saw you taking photographs," he continued, "what were you doing?"

"I was taking photographs," I responded, wondering if there were hidden cameras now capturing footage of me.

"What of?" he barked.

"Of Boots," I said. "And KFC. I was standing in a public street.  It is allowed. "

"No it's not," he said, increasingly irritated.

"Yes it is," I insisted.  "I work for a Member of Parliament and I think it would have come to my attention if it was now illegal to take photos of Boots and KFC from a public street."

"I work for the Home Office," he said. 

"No you don't," I countered.

"Well, I kind if do," he whimpered.

"You don't," I insisted. "Look, I would imagine you're only doing your job although, to be fair, I have absolutely no idea what that is.  Although you don't work for the Home Office.

"But if you really want to know, I write a pretty awful blog and I thought my one and only reader might wish to know that we have a drive-thru Boots and a drive to KFC right here in Guiseley."

"Oh, I see, " he replied with a sudden warmth.  "Right. Well that's alright then. Good"

"Thank you," I said, before shaking his hand and wishing him well with his career choice. Whatever that was.

Tomorrow I might ask if wants me to take his picture.

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