Monday 16 June 2008

Birth signs


1. Hiccuping
2. Straining
3. Bleeding
4. Loud squealing
5. Exhaustion
6. Body smelling like nail polish remover or acetone
7. Metallic smelling breath
8. Depression
9. Increased size
10. A desire to bite others

The above, my friends, are (according to the internet) ten tell-tale signs that the birth is not far away.

The birth, that is, of baby guinea pigs.

Vanessa, meanwhile, has pains in her legs which, according to "the book," do not suggest in any way that she - as opposed to a pregnant guinea pig - is set to pop any time soon.

Work tomorrow then.

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