Life for shy Josef

I see that incestuous, hostage-taking, raping, child-killing Austrian Josef Fritzl - who kept his daughter in a cellar for 24 years and fathered her seven children - has been sent down for life after being found guilty on all charges.

Perhaps, with all that extra time on his hands, he'll now get round to finishing that book he's been so keen to read all week.

And whilst I'm on the subject, if I were him, I would hold it a little further away from my face.

After all, surely he doesn't want short-sightedness to be added to his list of problems.