A taste of home

Most countries across the globe can claim culinary peculiarities of some description and Northern Ireland has two that quickly spring to mind: the Ulster Fry and Tayto Crisps (as represented opposite by Mr Tayto himself - obviously).

I'll talk about the Ulster Fry (or "heart attack on a plate," to give it its other name) another day. However, Tayto Crisps get Norn Iron folk very excited - especially those who no longer live there. And that, I think, is the key point.

After all, we always want what we cannot have and, in general, you can't get Tayto Crisps outside of Northern Ireland. The exception to this rule is Irish theme bars which often sell Tayto Cheese & Onion at extortionate prices.

However, I've never been a Tayto Cheese & Onion man myself, instead preferring the much more exciting (and I like to think discerning) option of Tayto Onion Rings.

I remember, when I was at primary school, laying my packet on the desk in front of me first thing in the morning. I then used to watch the clock and count the seconds until the bell for breaktime went and I could open my bag of Tayto Onion Rings. (That might explain why I didn't reach my academic peak in my early years. My failure in later years must've been caused by something else).

Needless to say the bags themselves were better in those days - two layers they had. A clear plastic inner bag and then a coloured outer bag on top. Magnificent.

Recent years have seen the inevitable rationalisation of the packet into just a single bag (I blame Gordon Brown), but the great taste of Tayto Onion Rings has remained. The only problem has been that I haven't been able to lay my hands on any. Until today, that is.

I was bored and was walking around a discount shop in Bradford looking for something with chocolate on it - that would brighten up my lunchtime, I thought. And there, in the distance, I saw them on a shelf. Tayto Onion Rings, loads of them.

I bought 18 packets in the end. Any more would have been just a little bit silly.

But I might go back tomorrow. Or I might just get a life.