Spot the difference

I did something really bad last night.

We'd given Jamie his bath and, after putting on his nappy (on him, not me) and a coating of baby oil, I was administering a final bit of male grooming.

He'd had a bit of a crusty forehead in the early days which has since been cured by a nightly application of baby moisturiser.

But, last night, my mind mustn't have been on the job.

I took a normal amount of moisturiser out of the container and sought to rub it into his head. However, instead of my fingers softly sliding across his skin, they came to something of a standstill.

I applied more moisturiser and, again, my fingers shuddered to a halt.

How could his head have got so dry?

So I slapped on a bit more. The same thing happened.

Jamie looked up at me non-plussed, three large white blobs upon his head.

Then the penny dropped.

It wasn't his moisturiser I was applying after all. It was his bum cream.

I did my best to wipe it off, using a combination of water, cotton wool balls, a towel and about half a dozen baby wipes. But I felt terrible.

And I don't mind admitting it, I also felt like an ar*e.