Happenings in the Conference bubble

Did you do anything interesting for breakfast this morning?

No? Same old, same old? Fair enough.

My experience was a little different to normal. I had breakfast with everyone's favourite terrorist godfather, Martin McGuinness.

That's him above (on the right of centre).

And this is him, pictured on a separate occasion, with some other Muppets.

When I say "I had breakfast with [him]," what I really mean is that I was one of about 60 people who ate breakfast in the same room as him during the traditional Ulster Fry event at Tory Conference.

The ex-IRA Chief of Staff turned Northern Ireland Deputy First Minister had been invited to give his views on all things Ulster and it was certainly interesting, even entertaining. Sadly, I wasn't close enough to his table to answer the question that, no doubt, MI5 has been able to answer for more than 35 years: whether Martin McGuinness has one sausage or two first thing in the morning.

The highlight of last night was the Irish Embassy reception in a plush room with a load of paintings. (None of them appeared to have been the work of Jamie so, not being an expert in these things, that's as much as I know).

However, the most entertaining moments for me came a little earlier at the London 2012 drinks do hosted by Seb Coe, one of my absolute heroes.

However, he wasn't the cause for the hilarity, which was instead provided by a gentleman named Chris Holmes, a hugely successful former British Paralympian and now one of the key individuals tasked with delivering the 2012 Paralympic Games.

Prior to him being called to speak, Seb Coe had explained that there would be a 10-day gap between the end of the Olympics and the start of the Paralymics in order to adapt the various venues for use by disabled athletes.

Then came Chris Holmes' turn which began with him being asked if 10 days were enough for the changes to be made.

With the audience waiting for a fairly predictable, "oh yes, we have great faith in Seb and the London 2012 Organising Committee who are just marvellous etc etc..." we got a bit of a shock.

"No," came his response, before pausing as the room fell deadly silent.

"There is absolutely no chance of that whatsoever and I think it's important we all know that now."

He waited for three or four seconds more.

"I'm only joking," he added with a smile - sending the room into bits.

But he wasn't finished.

Next, he was asked whether he believed the media sometimes failed to take Paralympians as seriously as they should and whether he had any examples of this. Unsurprisingly, he did.

"I remember once being invited to do a radio interview about the Paralympics and having to wait quite a while before going on air," explained Chris, who is blind.

"I was then told by the producer that the interview would have to be cut short and they would only have time to ask me a couple of questions.

"Eventually, the interviewer's voice came through on my headphones. He quickly introduced me before launching into his first question."

And here was how the brief exchange went:

Interviewer: "Chris, as a blind man, what's it like, speeding around corners in a wheelchair?"

Chris: "Very dangerous, particularly for spectators."

I expect Chris Holmes MBE to become something of a household name between now and the summer of 2012.